My Newest Marine

Chowhound is officially a PFC in the USMC. The graduation yesterday was held outside. It was cold but not unbearable. The ceremony was moving.

The first stop off the Island was at McDonald's for a sweet tea and to change clothes. He would have changed in the parking lot and car like his brother did but we were in a little more visible area than last year.

The only significant change I have noticed is he eats faster. He always savored his food. The first to start and the last to finish. That is no longer. I laughed at him last night sucking down steak and potatoes. I don't think he even chewed. I reminded him he wouldn't get yelled at now if he didn't eat fast enough. He laughed. I don't think he realized how fast and focused he was at eating.

It's good to have him home even if it's only for 17 days. Next weekend we will bring Improviser home for the holidays. The only missing will be Daredevil. He won't be home until April. He does call pretty often. Both Improviser and Daredevil called yesterday to congratulate their little brother. That was heartwarming.

So, now between my sister and I, we have our own little militia. We have 4 Marines and one Airman. Nobody better mess with us.

My New Airman

Isn't he handsome? Improviser is officially an Airman. He is glad to be finished with Basic Training. He will be home for Christmas. Yeah!

A dream that I wish hadn't come true

I still trying to wrap my mind around this whole ordeal. I knew my Dad's wife was evil and I guess I knew in my heart what she would do, but still it baffles me that someone can be so cruel. My Dad died and she did not tell any of his family. Not his two brothers and sister. Not his four daughters. She has contact information. It's not like she couldn't have gotten in touch with one of us or all of us. The ultimate control and isolation. She didn't even invite his family to honor him at his memorial service. He died Oct. 25 and we didn't find out until Nov. 17. We were told after his memorial service. That was mean. It was mean to my Dad. It was mean to us. How can someone be so heartless and cruel.

Several months ago I vividly dreamed this exact situation occurred. I dreamed it not once but twice. Both times I woke up in tears. I can't remember the details now but I woke up crying because I found out my Dad had died and she didn't tell us. Now, that is exactly what happened.

Dad, I love you with all my heart. I always have and I always will. I am glad you are finally away from her. I am sorry that you had to die to do it. I wish I had done more for you. You deserved to have a happy life. I am so sorry. I love and miss you.

No words can describe what I feel

Dad
July 7, 1934 - Oct. 25, 2008

Congratulations Improviser

I am heading to San Antonio, Texas. Lackland AFB to be more specific. This Friday Improviser graduates from Air Force Boot Camp.

CONGRATULATIONS IMPROVISER!!!
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!

Veteran's Day

This year Veteran's Day has an extra special meaning for me. This day honors not only all those who have served but those who are serving and this year it includes my sons and nephews. Although, Chowhound and Improviser are technically still recruits soon they will be officially serving the United States of America. And of course, Daredevil is currently in Iraq fighting for freedom. Two of my nephews are also Marines.

I went yesterday and added Daredevil and his two cousins to the Wall of Honor. The lady in the photo department was wonderful. She copied the photos and matted them. I was given the additional copies, which one was matted also, at no charge. She said it is the least they can do for what our veterans do for us. I was admiring a USMC Blanket while I was there and got to talking to another lady looking at it. He son was just awarded the purple heart. I fought back the tears. She told me that a simple flinch at the right time saved his life. The doctors told her if he hadn't turned his head at that split second he would have died. The bullet struck his neck and shoulder. He is still in rehab and will probably be discharged from the service. Although, Daredevil is over there in the middle of all this mess, it doesn't hit home until I hear stories from neighbors. Personal stories. I followed a car the other day that had a dedication to her son across the back window. He died in Iraq last year. It said "My Son, My Hero", "Home of the Free, Because of the Brave." I wanted to get out of my car and run up to her window and hug her and thank her. She probably would have thought I was nuts. I lost it. I drove down the road crying. I cried for her, for her son and for every family that has ever made a sacrifice so that I can live my life how I choose.

I was raised in a Military family. My father was a photographer in the Navy. My step-father was a mechanic Navy. He spent the majority of his time in submarines. My ex-husband was in the Navy. It is ironic that none of my boys joined the Navy. Two went into the Marines and one into the Air Force.

Thank you to all who have served or are serving.

Happy Birthday USMC

MARINE CORPS ORDERS
No. 47 (Series 1921)
HEADQUARTERS U.S. MARINE CORPS
Washington, November 1, 1921

759. The following will be read to the command on the 10th of November, 1921, and hereafter on the 10th of November of every year. Should the order not be received by the 10th of November, 1921, it will be read upon receipt.

(1) On November 10, 1775, a Corps of Marines was created by a resolution of Continental Congress. Since that date many thousand men have borne the name "Marine". In memory of them it is fitting that we who are Marines should commemorate the birthday of our corps by calling to mind the glories of its long and illustrious history.

(2) The record of our corps is one which will bear comparison with that of the most famous military organizations in the world's history. During 90 of the 146 years of its existence the Marine Corps has been in action against the Nation's foes. From the Battle of Trenton to the Argonne, Marines have won foremost honors in war, and in the long eras of tranquility at home, generation after generation of Marines have grown gray in war in both hemispheres and in every
corner of the seven seas, that our country and its citizens might enjoy peace and security.

(3) In every battle and skirmish since the birth of our corps, Marines have acquitted themselves
with the greatest distinction, winning new honors on each occasion until the term "Marine" has come to signify all that is highest in military efficiency and soldierly virtue.

(4) This high name of distinction and soldierly repute we who are Marines today have received
from those who preceded us in the corps. With it we have also received from them the eternal spirit which has animated our corps from generation to generation and has been the distinguishing mark of the Marines in every age. So long as that spirit continues to flourish Marines will be found equal to every emergency in the future as they have been in the past, and the men of our Nation will regard us as worthy successors to the long line of illustrious men who have served as "Soldiers of the Sea" since the founding of the Corps.

JOHN A. LEJEUNE,
Major General Commandant
75705--21

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE UNITED STATES MARINE CORPS

I am proud of the young men in our family who chose the Marine Corps as their Duty. My Daredevil (left) is presently in Iraq. "R" (Middle) is in Okinawa. And, "G" (right) just returned from Iraq. These are my nephews.

Also, my youngest, Chowhound, is currently at Parris Island becoming a Marine. He is in Training Week 8. On Dec. 12th he will become a Marine.

I am very proud to be a Marine Mom. The network and support is amazing. Marines are amazing. I thank each and every Marine for the sacrifices that have been made.

Getting away from Nothing

This week has been as unhurried as a sloth. I've spent my days strolling down the tranquil, deserted beach or curled up with a book traveling to places not so far away.

How do I change?

How do I change?
If I feel depressed I will sing.
If I feel sad I will laugh.
If I feel ill I will double my labour.
If I feel fear I will plunge ahead.
If I feel inferior I will wear new garments.
If I feel uncertain I will raise my voice.
If I feel poverty I will think of wealth to come.
If I feel incompetent I will think of past success.
If I feel insignificant I will remember my goals.
Today I will be the master of my emotions.

-Og Mandino,

Fed Up

Dear Mr. Obama,

I know you are running for President of the United States. I know a lot of people have donated tons of money to your campaign and you feel you must spend it.

All.

You know why I know this?

Because I have heard your stupid commercials a billion times. I hated to turn on my TV prior to this but now I am considering having the cable disconnected.

I hate listening to the radio now. I used to love to listen to it. Not any more. The five minutes I have in the car on the way to and from work is now taken up with your "spots".

SHUT THE HELL UP!

I am tired of it. I am tired of you.

I am tired of people calling my house and waking me up to see if I am going to vote for you.

HELL NO! Does that mean anything to you?

I realize you are keeping the printers, the post office, and the garbage men employed. But, send your damn flyers to someone who cares. And that is not me. Go drop them over Iraq or Africa. They need toilet paper over there.

I used to love the internet. Not any more. Your face pops up everywhere I click. Get a life. Get out of mine.

Now, today, you violated my cell phone. I got a stupid voice mail about your campaign. I couldn't hit #7 fast enough to delete it. It is now contaminated. I started running around like Lucy when Snoopy kisses her. "BLEAGH! Get hot water! Get some disinfectant! Get some iodine!"

Why don't you use the money you have received for some good? Bail out the stupid banks with it. Don't take any more of my hard earned money. You want my vote? Put your money where your mouth is. All talk and no action doesn't do a damn thing for me.

So shut the hell up. Quit wasting money trying to convince me that I want you to be my President. If you're going to run the country like your running your campaign then we are in a whole lot more trouble than we are now. You are showing no responsibility. None.

Leave my health care alone. It's fine. If I'm sick. I go to the Dr. They take my $20, tell me what's wrong and send me to the pharmacy for my $5 prescription. I can handle it.

Leave our military alone. They have a job to do whether or not you agree with it. It employs my three boys. They are earning a decent wage and learning discipline, self-respect and a trade all while protecting the very freedoms you enjoy.

This is supposed to be OUR Government. I don't want YOUR Government to control my life. I can and do make responsible decisions for myself. I don't need someone to make them for me. Leave me the hell alone.

Got it? I've had enough. That goes for every politician. Straighten your own life out. Mine is just fine.

Time Marches On

I'm adjusting to being alone. It sucks. I'm not adjusting well. I'll get there. It has only been a week.

Encouragement

"When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place."

~ Unknown

Overall, emotionally, I've done pretty well the last couple of days. Now, if I could just get rid of this cold.

One to go...

Improviser came over tonight. Waltzed into the kitchen and the next thing I knew he was cooking me dinner. The only one of my three boys that cooks. He made Chowhound a chocolate cherry cake with fudge icing before he left for bootcamp. It was made from scratch. No box, no mix. He shows love with food. I love this about him. I am going to miss him so much. These next two weeks are going to be special since it will be the first time since he was 16 months old that he didn't have to share me with his brothers (he's 22, do the math, it's been a looooooooong time). I am going to cherish every moment.

Daredevil is packed up and turning his cell phone off tonight. He starts his journey towards Iraq tomorrow. I told him to keep an eye out for his cousin who is packing up and leaving Iraq Thursday to come back to the states. Who knows, they may just cross paths somewhere while in transit. I sent out a care package today so he should get it upon his arrival. Please pray for his safety in his travels and for the next seven months. Please pray for all of our troops.

Chowhound is in day 2 of bootcamp. He is sleeping in hallways, getting yelled at, and having his head scrapped bald. He is going to look like this again.


This picture cracks me up. He insisted that I shave his head. I cried. He was happy as a clam. I doubt that he is smiling now. Only 13 weeks to go.

Day 2-

Graduation day is tough for adults. They go to the ceremony as parents. They come home as contemporaries. After twenty-two years of child-rearing, they are unemployed. (Erma Bombeck)


I'm not unemployed. Now, I'm a consultant. I should start making the big money now. Oh yeah, parenting pays in hugs and I love yous. I'll take that.

Day 1 of being on my own

"And I know what I have to do now. I gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?" (Cast Away)

This is how I feel today. I heard this quote before I cried myself to sleep last night. I'm a big girl. I can do this. I realize I have been way too dependent on my children. It's time for me to figure out what I want to do when I grow up.

As a kid and teenager, I always felt lost. There was this empty space inside of me that longed for something. I tried to fill it with activities and friends and then booze and other unhealthy stuff. Nothing filled that void I felt. I graduated from high school at 17 and had no direction, no goals, no aim. I took the path that I was told I should. I got a job, signed up for a full schedule at the Jr. college and started my life. I still didn't have a purpose. For the next few years, I bounced in and out of school, jobs, and relationships. I grew moody, angry, and volatile. The emptiness grew. I still felt lost and lonely. I still had no purpose. Then, at 20, I got pregnant. That was the pivotal point in my life. The stability I needed. And even though I still have been in and out of relationships throughout my life, I have always had my kids. For the past 22 years I have had a reason to get up in the morning. I had a purpose for working. After I had my children, the empty space disappeared.

Now I have to find a new purpose.
_______________________________________________

8:20 PM

Just got back from the grocery store. I ambled up and down the grocery aisles feeling sorry for myself. I kept passing by the things that I would normally buy for the boys, snacks and stuff, that otherwise I won't buy for myself. I strained to think of what to buy and how to cook for one. I've never had to do that. Ever. I went from cooking for my mom and I to cooking for a husband and then children. This will be a new concept and experience. This morning I threw out all the junk food in the house. I'm eliminating temptation and concentrating on getting back in shape. I've never been this out of shape in my life. Anyways, back to shopping. It was depressing. I struggled and then it hit me. My children didn't die, they moved away from home. I can still do things for them. I have lots to do right now. Daredevil will need care packages and cards and letters. His birthday is the 21st and it is bad enough that he has to spend it in Iraq or where ever he will be at that time but to not get anything from mom would be heart breaking. I can't do that to my son. The first care package for Daredevil is packed and ready to send out tomorrow. It should arrive at his post in Iraq about the same time he does. Birthday cards are signed and sealed and will be going out as well.

The scripted call from Parris Island just came in a few minutes ago. Chowhound will have an address sent to me in a few days. I have three months of letter writing to him. And then in a couple of weeks, I will be writing to Improviser.

Oh my. Suddenly, I feel really busy. It feels good.

"When mothers talk about the depression of the empty nest, they're not mourning the passing of all those wet towels on the floor, or the music that numbs your teeth, or even the bottle of capless shampoo dribbling down the shower drain. They're upset because they've gone from supervisor of a child's life to a spectator. It's like being the vice president of the United States." (Erma Bombeck)
**Shhhhh. Don't send that quote to Sarah Palin.

Update

Okay, you can stop lashing me with wet noddles. Sorry I didn't post an update. Yes, my Sweetie made it out of Turks and Caicos before Hurricane Ike pounded the little islands. We spent a couple of days together, including his birthday on Monday, and then he flew to south Florida Tuesday. He showed up back here on Wednesday with a 24ft UHaul and then left for Turks and Caicos on Saturday. I'm not sure when he will return. I figure I won't see him again until Christmas. I hope it'll be sooner but I'm not counting on it. We had a great time while he was here.

So, I said goodbye to Daredevil on the 2nd. He went back to California. Now he leaves this week headed to Iraq.

My Sweetie left yesterday.

Chowhound left a few hours ago. Tomorrow he will step in the yellow footsteps at Parris Island.

Improviser leaves in 15 days.

Too many goodbyes this month. I'm hanging in there.

I don't like Ike

My Sweetie is presently in the Turks and Caicos Islands. I'm hoping and praying his 10:45am flight is not canceled. The last chance to get out of Dodge before Ike comes storming through. I'll be on pins and needles until I know he is in the states, checked through Miami and on his way here.

Come Hell and High Water

Daredevil leaves today. I won't see him again until he returns from Iraq. (this is the Hell part)
Chowhound leaves in 12 days.
Improviser in 29.
(but who's counting)





and now the high water part. Hurricane Hannah is hanging over my Sweetie. He is in Provo in the Turks and Caicos Islands. Last night he was in the eye. The news reports there were telling them the storm was over. This morning that are getting hammered. It's only a Cat I but when you are on a little island this is still bad. And Ike is on Hannah's heels.

This month just keeps getting better. (and it's only day 2. Crap.)

Time Marches On

September is here already. I want to skip this month almost as much as I want to skip November and December. I vote that we jump to October now and then skip over to say April. I hate winter. I like October because I love the weather then and it's my birth month. I can handle October. In November I start getting psycho. First, there is way too much food and secondly it's the lead in for the Chaos of Christmas. Don't get me wrong. I love Christmas. I just can't afford it. I try to keep things simple. But, I am a procrastinator. I wait until the last minute to get prepared. On Christmas Eve you can find me starting my shopping. I've been working on that but it is usually finances that make me procrastinate. I always dread December.

But, this year September is the demon month. Daredevil leaves this tomorrow*. He'll be in California for a couple of weeks and then he will be of to Camp Korean Village, Iraq. Even though I haven't seen him a lot in the last two weeks he's been here, it has been wonderful having him home. I love having my boys together. I even smile now when they pick and fight with each other because I know I won't hear that any more. In two weeks, Chowhound will report to Parris Island and two weeks after that Improviser will head to Lackland Air Force Base. All my "babies" will be gone.

Today, we are going bowling. That ought to be a blast as I suck at bowling. The last time I went it was with two friends of mine. Three middle-aged women using the bumpers is quite entertaining. But, it's not about the scores. It is time spent together. I am taking a camera. I wish I had video as I can never do justice to the insane hysteria that is present anytime all my boys are together.

Case in point. The other night, I hauled them out for family pictures. First, all three boys pounced on the roller coaster bead mazes in the lobby like they were dessert. Then, Daredevil and Chowhound immediately start a reinactment of this video. Chowhound hollars at Daredevil, "Put on a tie."


It went downhill from there. Daredevil grabs a rose and poses with it. They are all poking me and pushing each other. They made faces. A two year old would have been better behaved. The photographer was great. She has three young boys herself and she immediately just went with the flow and started harassing them.

But, none of this bothered me. They were just laughing and goofing off. They know how to behave when it's important. Right now, it was important to laugh. Although, there was a thin line when Daredevil dared Chowhound to jump up and headbutt the ceiling joist. Chowhound accomplished the feat and proudly wore the red mark on his head. I did a lot of blinking and shaking of my head.

All of this was before dinner. Dinner was even more hysterical. Ever since the kids were big enough to play card games, I have carried a deck in my purse for entertainment purposes. I found that it alleviated a lot of stress if they had something to do while we were waiting for our food. I get fussed at if I don't have them for some reason. Chowhound made sure I had the cards before we left the house. We used to play rummy, war, and speed when there were only two of us. But lately, we have started playing Bu!!sh*t. Now, if there are people, especially little kids, they have to say "BS". It is always a lot of fun especially when we are all together.

UPDATE: This post is incomplete. Daredevil leaves today. I got distracted. I'll post Part II sometime. My ADD kicked in.

Working (Wo)Man's Holiday

Happy Labor Day!


...a day to honor those "who from rude nature have delved and carved all the grandeur we behold."