Christmas Reservations

The airline reservations are a done deal. However, my internal mother reservations are still wavering. Chowhound and I are going to spend Christmas with my Sweetie. For those of you who don't know, Sweetie lives on an island in the Bahamas. Naturally, Chowhound is excited and Daredevil and Improviser are pouting. I hate not having all my boys with me for Christmas. But, finances and schedules play a really big part in the plans.

Chowhound was supposed to go with me this summer. A few days before our scheduled departure, an opportunity arose for him to tour with a drum and bugle corps for the summer and he chose not to go with me then. So, he already has his ticket paid for. I cannot afford to take everyone at one time. Plus, Daredevil has to work and Improviser has to look for work since he was laid off. And somebody has to take care of the dog.

I talked it over with the boys before I made the decision. Chowhound thinks it great. Of course. He gets to go to the Bahamas without his brothers. The other two understand and are ok with it (I think) and are having fun making me feel guilty. Which isn't necessary since I feel guilty without their help. I love being with my boys especially at Christmas. Although, since they are now older teenagers the magic of Christmas is not the same. They will not be alone though. They will spend the holidays with their dad. Also, their Aunt has invited them over to her house which is a 5 hour drive. Which is probably where they will go. But, that scares me too. Road trip + teenagers alone for the first time = speeding tickets. I worry about accidents too, but I'm trying really, really, really hard not to think about that.

I believe Daredevil and Improviser have a TV idea of what "the Bahamas" are like. They are probably picturing half naked women wandering the beaches. This island is not like that. This island is just beginning to be touristized. Most of the roads are still unpaved. There is no Mall, no convenience stores, movie theater or anything. The only blockbuster on the island is the guy parked under the tree selling videos out of his trunk. This is not a place where you can just run up to the store. It's like stepping back in time. Which is probably why I love it. But, not a heaven for hormone driven teenagers. There is diving and fishing and four wheeling and jet ski-ing, weather permitting. Well, maybe on the other hand they would have a great time. Guilt setting in again. I think I'll go invest a few bucks in the FL Redneck Retirement fund aka FL lottery. Maybe then I can take everyone. But, then what would I do with the dog? Sheesh! It's always something.

I'm Delenn

Devoutly dedicated to helping lead others to glory, you are a strong, supportive, and spiritual caregiver.

Summoned, I take the place that has been prepared for me.

Delenn is a character in the Babylon 5 universe. You can read her biography at the Worlds of JMS fansite.

Happy Gobble Gobble Day

It's the national it's ok to stuff your self silly day. Overeating is publicly accepted and encouraged. I am off to Pensacola to spend time with my family. That should give me plenty to blog about. Never a dull moment when I get together with my three sisters. So, have a great Thanksgiving and forget about the diet until January.

Nervous Mother

Sometimes I hate being a mother. Like tonight. I'm sitting on pins and needles waiting for the two oldest boys to come home. They went downtown for a concert fest. An all day event sponsored by a local radio station. The day part didn't bother me. Coming home from downtown at night does. It is easy to miss the exit and end up in some not so comforting neighborhoods. Improviser and Daredevil are 18 and 19. They are old enough to go by themselves. Rationally, I tell myself this. But, the mother part that wants to protect them still worries. I'm waiting by the phone. I jump everytime it rings. Watching them "spread their wings" is like watching them take their first step. It scares you not them.

They went to this event last year. I took them. I stayed on site, out of the way and read a book. Just in case. Call me over protective, but they were barely 17 and 18 and I had no idea what it would be like there. It was a well managed event last year. I know they need to grow up and I trust my boys so I feel confident that they won't be an any trouble. But, it 's still a mother's fear.

Kid Quotes

Just a few things I have overheard kids say lately. I hear good things all the time and make a mental note to remember it. But, apparently I'm out of cerebral post it notes or mental ink because I can't remember most of them.

Overheard from my neighbor's backyard: a little boy's voice, "I have a hose and I know how to use it."

One little girl to another in Wal-Mart while their mothers stood talking, "Don't sit on the floor. They'll sweep you up and you'll be gone."

I was asking Chowhound about the movie he was watching. He turned, pointed the remote at me and said, "Mute".

Alarm Clock Meme

I probably shouldn't announce this because it's asking for trouble, but I have been tagged with my first Meme by Oddybobo. And I agree with her, it's not even a cool one. But, having a lack of material lately, it gives me something to post. So here goes nothing.

1. Do you use an alarm clock to wake up in the morning?
Not to wake up. I set it but I am usually awake before it goes off.

2. What time do you set it for?
5AM. I am a morning person. I love the quiet of the mornings and this is when I get the most done.

3. Do you hit the snooze button? If so how many times?
Sometimes. Usually once or twice if I got to bed late.

4. Have you ever abused an alarm clock?
No. But, my ex had one when we got married that I made him get rid of because I couldn't stand the sound of it. It was extremely irritating and made me want to abuse more than the alarm clock.

5. It’s time to spread some “It’s Blogcess” linky love.

Rules of the game, so I have been told:

First: Copy and paste #1 - #5(Make sure to link to: “It’s Blogcess”, which is the link in #5. Because it’s always polite to link to the one who started the linky love.)

Second: Link to my site (because it’s polite to link to the site that tagged you).

Third: Go and tag up to five other blogs, or more if ya like.

Fourth: Email the owner of, or post on the blogs that you have tagged, to inform them that you’ve tagged them.

So, who do I tag? No one. I'll wait for a better one. Beside, everyone I know already did this, I think.

Another Goofy Mom

This must be Goofy Mom Week. I'm still wiping the tears from my eyes after reading Bou's admission to being a Goofy Mom. I can stand proudly beside her after the stunt I pulled last night.

It has been a brain draining week. I am now fully submerged in my new position at work. It is all brain work and little physical activity. Whereas, for the last 8 years it's been just the opposite. My brain is screaming overload. When I get home now, I don't want to do anything that requires thinking or concentration. Hence, the lack of posts this week. So, last night I was vegging in bed checking my eyelids for leaks, when Chowhound comes and requests I cut his hair. I'm still in a blurry state. But, not wanting to disillusion my child on my motherly qualities, I drag myself out of bed and stare at the clock. It was 7:30pm. That should pretty much sum up my week and state of mind. I told him to get everything set up in the garage and I would be there shortly. Now, I am not a hairstylist. I do buzz cuts only. Nothing fancy here. Chowhound and Daredevil like my haircuts. Improviser won't come near me when I have clippers in my hand. Last night, Chowhound should have taken his advice. Now, Chowhound went to all the trouble last night to thoroughly clean the clippers. He took them apart, oiled them and put them back together. I was impressed. It was more than I have ever done. I usually just rinse them in a vat of WD-40, wipe it off and hope for the best. Chowhound likes his hair short. I always use a #2 guard. Well, in my brain stupor and admiration of his cleaning job on the clippers, I forgot to put any type of guard on it. Opps. I didn't realize my mistake until he had a nice reverse Mohawk going. On the side of his head. OMG. I couldn't believe I did that. I once shaved him completely bald at his request. He does not have the head for it. Some people can pull it off; Chowhound is not one of them. So, not wanting him to be totally bald, I finished it with the #1 guard, lots of apologies and a promise that in a week it would grow out and we could even it out. He has a band competition today. And since he is in the pit, he doesn't have the advantage of a hat. I might be out of the haircut business for good now.

Birth Order Quiz

You Are Likely A Fourth Born

At your darkest moments, you feel angry. At work and school, you do best when your analyzing. When you love someone, you tend to be very giving. In friendship, you don't take the initiative in reaching out. Your ideal jobs are: factory jobs, comedy, and dentistry. You will leave your mark on the world with your own personal philosophy.

The Birth Order Predictor

This Quiz surprised me because it's right. I am the fourth born.

My Jack-o-lantern face

I know, I know. I'm a little late with this. But, I'm a bargain shopper. I do after the holidays sales. So you shouldn't be surprised that I'm just now finding and posting this.

discover your jack-o-lantern face @ quiz me

Hat tip to Cindermutha's Corner.

Shoeboxes for Seniors

My company is involved in another community project. This one I like. It's Shoe Boxes for Seniors. We have a list of items that can be purchased and placed in a decorated shoe box. The shoe boxes will be distributed to the area nursing homes. This is a worthwhile project. Too many seniors are tossed into nursing homes and forgotten and neglected. It's not always intentional. Sometimes it's for convenience. Sometimes, it's because there is no one else.

This project reminded me of a very special lady I met in 1995. I only knew her briefly but she impacted my life and I will never forget her. I interviewed Sally for one of my history assignments in college. She was 93 at the time, according to the nursing home staff. She claimed she was 87. A woman and her vanity, no need to argue; you won't win. She was a riot. She wasn't there because she was impaired. She didn't have anywhere else to go. She had outlived her husband and both her sons. Her current boyfriend was the furry four legged variety that stayed curled up in her lap purring. Sally had an amazing life. She had been set up to go to law school. A daring thing in itself for a woman during that time. But, instead she ditched college and went into vaudeville. She danced and sang for years. She finally went to nursing school and during wartime met her husband. Her tired eyes perked up when she talked of him and all she had done. It was wonderful talking to her but sad too. She felt she was just wasting space. Everyone she loved was gone and she wasn't useful any more. I visited her a few times and then I moved away too.

So, the Shoeboxes for Seniors is a project that touches my heart because we will be going and handing these out personally. There is a lot of life and experience in the residents of a home. Most of the people love to have visitors. It doesn't matter if they know you or not. They are wonderful to talk to. And if you really want to see a Senior's eyes light up, take a toddler with you. Most love to see small children. I think the orphanages, day care centers and nursing homes need to be side by side.

Poem from the Past

I have always collected poems, tidbits and anything else I found interesting. While sifting through a box of "memories", I came across this cute little poem. I have been hauling this one around for approximately 30 years. I know this because I have my sixth grade teacher's name and my homeroom number on it. But, shame on my teacher. She did not put the author's name on it, but I did. Hope you get a giggle or two.

Sick

"I cannot go to school today."
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
"I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more-that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My let is cut, my eyes are blue
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke_
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in.
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained.
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb,
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my spine is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is___What?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is....Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play!?

Shel Silverstein

I'm back

Highlights of my trip:

American Airlines gives birthday presents. At least they do me. For two years in a row now, they have given me an all expense paid night in Miami. Note to self: Next year have Sweetie with you.

Warning, if you are on the fifth floor of the hotel and the elevator buttons don't work, don't take the stairs because they keep the doors to the other floors locked and you have to walk back up. I'm really glad there wasn't a fire.

There is apparently a no luggage in the restaurant law. I was told to leave my luggage in the hotel lobby while I ate. I didn't. I left.

Always make sure your children are fully awake when you tell them what time to pick you up at the airport.

Start worrying when you find a BIG CITY TATTOO card in your car. I was told they were just looking. I haven't seen any tattoos and if they did and I can't see them, I don't want to see them.

The police chief of a small town will bring your child home if he is walking around on Halloween night dressed all in black carrying a paint ball gun. And he will take one of the paint balls to use for identification in case anyone complains.

Teenagers and DOGS can exist on Ramen noodles.

If your teenagers says, "I did not skip on Friday or Monday" figure out which day he did not include. (Tuesday)

Make sure when you have your ride drop you off to get your car keys from your kid, that you kid has the car. (The car was at home)

Prepare yourself before you walk in the house when your son says, "I thought you were coming home yesterday. It was clean then."

Happy Birthday to Me!

Yes, I'm tooting my own horn. I love my birthday. It means I have survived another year and I'm beginning anew. I am now officialy forty-something. I figure every day on this side of the dirt is a good one and I'm going to celebrate it. So everyone have a great weekend and celebrate with me in spirit.

Don't need cheese anymore

Harvey, you can have your hoop of Cheddar cheese back. I don't need it. American Airlines changed their notice and are up and running full operations again. MY TRIP IS BACK ON! Yippie!!!!!!! Tomorrow, I am Bahamas bound to be with my Sweetie and celebrate my birthday. All is good.

Got any cheese?

'cause, I'm whining. What a sucky day this has turned out to be. First, I get roped into helping give free handouts to the not so f(ing) needy. Then, I find out I'm a victim of Wilma's aftermath. Plus, it's cold. Yes, I'm whining and I'm pissed. The only way this could have been "better" would be if I was PMSing. Which I'm not, but might as well be. WTF pile it all on. I don't care.

Every year, my company sponsors a food drive through one of the local food banks. I don't volunteer for it. I'd rather go poke my eyes out or pull my fingers out or some other form of torture. It's not that I don't like helping people. On the contrary, I'll be the first to give you the shirt off my back or help you in any way I can, if you need it. But, it absolutely galls me to hand out free food to some of these people. Yes, some need and deserve the help. But, then you have the ones with the brand new cars, talking on their cell phones and complaining about what you're giving them. F them. They already receive food stamps and live in free housing. I'm tired of supporting them. They need to get off their dead asses and contribute. I'm a single mother of three teenage boys and I work my ass off to support myself and them. At one time, I lived in subsidized housing and received food stamps. (But, my car was a POS and I didn't have any luxuries.) I have been there. I understand that sometimes you need help. But, you have two choices work the system to get out or work the system to stay in. I wanted out. I put myself through college while raising three toddlers on my own. Screw these people. If I can do it so can they.

Second rant. I HATE HURRICANES, MIAMI, AND AMERICAN AIRLINES. And, not necessarily in that order. Hurricane Wilma destroyed my plans. I was supposed to fly down tomorrow and spend my birthday weekend with my Sweetie. American canceled my flight out of Miami. This Sucks. Another birthday celebration by myself. Last year, I spent my birthday stuck in a hotel in Miami because of a dispatcher dispute. This year, I don't even make it down there. I guess being home is better than being stuck in Miami right now. But, I'm bummed. I miss my Sweetie. I haven't seen him since Sept and was really, really looking forward to spending four days with him. Now, I'll have to wait until Christmas. This really, really sucks. I'm going to check for flights out of other airports and see if I can make it down there somehow. But, what a bitch.

And now it's frickin cold. I hate being cold. I don't have any cheese so I'll stop whining.

No Blog Fodder---"You're Grounded"

Nothing much today. The boys haven't created any new blog fodder. Maybe I should ground them for that. Hmmm. Getting grounded for not screwing up. I'll have to put some thought in to this and make sure the punishment fits the crime. What would be the punishment for being too good? Grounded for life. Oh, wait. Daredevil is grounded for life already. His Dad did that one. Gotta think. Any suggestions as to how I can make my good kids bad examples? Sounds like a good List. Now I have something to think about and possibly post. Guess this should have been titled "Brainstorming Post".

How VW and I fought High School Boredom

There is an obvious and simple pattern to this post. Can you decipher it?VW this should bring back memories and smiles and probably slapping of the forehead.

During our high school days, VWBug and I found all sorts of ways to interrupt the boredom and monotony of school work.Since we could only duel with our imaginary swords between classes, we distracted ourselves during class writing notes.At first they were all plain and straight forward. But, that left the imagination thirsty.So, we began writing encrypted notes. This is an example of how we wrote some of them.This wasn't so the underworld spy teachers couldn't catch us. It was purely boredom control.Our notes progressively got longer and more complicated.I wish I still had some of them.I would love to remember what we wrote about.
VW, Thanks for making High School tolerable.

Beer Troubleshooting

SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.
FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.

SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet.
FAULT: Improper bladder control.
ACTION: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training.

SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless.
FAULT: Glass empty.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights.
FAULT: You have fallen over backward.
ACTION: Have yourself leashed to bar.

SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts.
FAULT: You have fallen forward.
ACTION: See above.

SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.
FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face.
ACTION: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.

SYMPTOM: Floor blurred.
FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Floor moving.
FAULT: You are being carried out.
ACTION: Find out if you are being taken to another bar.

SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark.
FAULT: Bar has closed.
ACTION: Confirm home address with bartender.

SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures.
FAULT: Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations.
ACTION: Cover mouth.

SYMPTOM: Everyone looks up to you and smiles.
FAULT: You are dancing on the table.
ACTION: Fall on somebody cushy-looking.

SYMPTOM: Beer is crystal-clear.
FAULT: It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up.
ACTION: Punch him.

SYMPTOM: Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear.
FAULT: You have been in a fight.
ACTION: Apologize to everyone you see, just in case it was them.

SYMPTOM: Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in.
FAULT: You've wandered into the wrong party.
ACTION: See if they have free beer.

SYMPTOM: Your singing sounds distorted.
FAULT: The beer is too weak.
ACTION: Have more beer until your voice improves.

SYMPTOM: Don't remember the words to the song.
FAULT: Beer is just right.
ACTION: Play air guitar.

Stolen from The Toque

Remi and Rue

This is Remington. Home protection at it's best. I sometimes think he is the smartest one in the house. Now, I know why. When we aren't home he is busy studying. Maybe he can teach the boys.



This is my darling little Rue and her "boyfriend".

How desperate can you get?

I have sunk to a new low. I desperately needed chocolate last night. That nawing at you, frantic, leave me alone or I'll bite your head off until I get chocolate desperate. Mother Hubbard's cupboards were bare. Nothing. No vehicle to go to the store. Damn. I kept searching and searching the kitchen like a crazed crack head. Hoping a snickers bar or something would magically appear. I opened the freezer and hit pay dirt. Except it was embedded in orange sherbert. Yuck. I hate orange sherbet. So, being in the chocolate state of mind, I picked the itty bitty chocolate chips out of the sherbet. It couldn't have added up to one bite of a hersheys bar. But, I got my fix. If you don't hear from me for a while it's because I have checked into the Willy Wonka Rehab.