Wednesday, July 21, 2010

How I can make my millions

I had to write a paper for my Human Relations class. The assignment was:

Technological changes have resulted in the publishing industry falling on hard times. Fewer people are reading newspapers since they can get the same information faster (and perhaps cheaper) from TV and the Internet. Students are getting more content information in their courses from the Web, and sales of standard textbooks are declining. Overall, the publishing industry needs to change, but to what? And how?

The VP for Marketing and the VP for Technology are called into a meeting with the president of Prentice Publishing and his Senior VP for Finance. They ask that the two VP’s meet with them again next week to present their independent views of how the company should change to meet these challenges and how this change can be brought about.

What should the VP’s report to the president? Play the role of either the VP for Marketing or the VP for Technology and advise the president fully of what should be done and how to effectively bring this change about. Defend your views from the scientific viewpoint. Post your response on the Discussion Board and then read and reply to posts that oppose the view you have taken.

My response is a stroke of genius. I think I'm on to something here.

As the world moves into its “green” phase advocates are urging people to go paperless. This is especially true in the publishing industry. As VP for Marketing, I propose that we form an alliance with the manufacturers of bathroom paper. It is urgent that we reform our perceptions of reading material. The bathroom is one area that will not go paperless. We will market disposable bathroom readers. Books should be printed on toilet paper. Americans alone use 433 million miles of toilet paper annually. ( As we all know, there can be some considerable downtime during an average trip to the bathroom. Using the telephone seems contra-indicated given the circumstances, and watching television or a movie can come off as a bit too self-indulgent. This would appear to leave reading as the most viable time-killing option for long-term bathroom occupants”. ( According to a survey on bathroom habits 29% of people read in the bathroom whenever possible and 42% say they sometimes read while using the facilities. This means that almost 71% of people read in the bathroom. ( And 100% of homes use toilet paper. (I used common sense on that statistic. If all homes don’t, I’m not going there) Most homes now have two or more bathrooms. This would mean at least two books per household at a time. We could market different reading levels and even series. Families could have holders and name cards for each individual so someone didn’t use your book and lose your place. There could even be picture “books” for toddlers that are potty training. There could be a guest roll with short stories so they could finish reading before they left. They could tear it off at the beginning of the next story so the next guest could enjoy it. This would be a win-win situation. You can’t wipe with a laptop.

Who should I contact first?