Don't blink

I love Kenny Chesney's new song. I absolutely love it. Don't blink. It is so true. I look at the young men my boys have become and I wonder when it happen. How did I miss it? I must have blinked. Oh how I tried so hard not too.

Then I think about how my mother must feel as her oldest child gets ready to turn 50. How she must feel looking at her grandchildren and her great grandchildren. At how the world has changed in her 74 years. I wonder if she feels like she blinked.

And then I think how my grandmother must feel. She was born in 1914. She has seen things get better and worse. The living conditions have gotten better. The condition of humanity and how we treat each other has gotten worse. She has seen so much in her 93 years. She blinked the the depression was here. She blinked it was gone. She blinked her daughter was born. She blinked her husband died. She blinked and a new love entered her life. And she blinked and blinked and life keeps changing.

Signs you have a teenager

1. You get excited when you get to drive your own car.
2. You are in shock when you discover cash in your wallet.
3. Every time you get in your car it is on "E".
4. There is never any food in your house even though you go grocery shopping every day.
5. You cannot plan any activity for you and your child that starts before Noon.


Feel free to add your own.

B*tchiness indicator

You Are 23% Bitchy

You're a pretty sweet person, and you're definitely not prone to bitchy outbursts. Sometimes, though, you can't help thinking mean thoughts about people. But at least you don't act on them!

How Bitchy Are You?

Maybe that's why I can't stay married. (It says 23%)

Another letter

I got another letter. I got another letter. That makes 3 so far. It takes so little to make a mother happy. But, then I opened the letter and found out why I'm getting mail now. They were quarantined. His entire platoon. His SDI said they made Parris Island history. The only platoon to ever be quarantined. I'm assuming since this letter was several days ago that everything is okay now. He said he had a slight fever and that the ones with the high fevers they were putting in isolation. There are approximately 20 recruits from his platoon put in isolation. He didn't say why. I'm not sure what they were watching for. He said he was bored lying in his rack for two days. He did say this would not affect his graduation date.

He is now is Phase 2. This week is Swim Week. His cousin warned him. It's not just playing in the pool. But even with all the gear they have to wear, I'm sure it will feel good since it's been so hot. He loved the confidence course.

"Oh, yesterday we did the confidence course. It was so much fun. I passed everything with flying colors. None of it was real hard. The one I had the most fun on was the "A-frame". I had to climb a 20ft rope, then climb through a foot and a half gap between 2 logs then walk across some logs with about 6 inches between them. Then, climb up a 10 or 15 ft "A-frame" with 4 x4s on it then grab a rope, which I could just barely reach, and slide down the rope to some mats at the bottom. It was so much fun."

He has always been my climber. As a child, he would climb on top of the playground equipment. I'm talking about the roof covering it not just the top of the monkey bars. He did that one time with one arm in a sling because he had a broken collar bone. Yeah, the confidence course was right up his alley.

I'm counting down the days. October 19 will be here soon.

It is strange just having one child at home now. Well, one I'm responsible for anyways. He is never home. Between band and school starting back up. I see him occasionally. Last night, was open house. We breezed through, met his teachers and were done before the time it officially started. He only has 3 teachers other than the band director I've known for the last 8 years. He has two band classes. Plus, he is trying to become a Band Aide. (snicker snicker). I've made all kinds of corny jokes about that. He has rolled his eyes and shook his head so much at my stupid jokes that he looks possessed. They also can have an optional 7th period. Guess what he's taking. Band. More than half his day will be spent annoying the Band Director. Talk about an easy Senior Year. Four Band classes, sign language, economics and English. He better take advantage of things now. This is the easiest life is ever going to be.

Amazing Boys

I haven't posted on Improviser lately. He is more of a low key person than the other two. Daredevil and Chowhound jump in and make a lot of noise at whatever they do compared to Improviser who quietly trudges down his own path. He tried the Jr. College path a bit but it's just not his thing. So after a semester or two of completing the classes he enjoyed the most and dropping the required ones he has put it off a bit. I don't blame him. I was bored too. So, now he is sharing an apartment with 3 other young adults. They struggle but they seem to keep their heads above water. He is committed to making it on his own. He has found that the work force is tough and doesn't pay much when you have no skills. This may eventually drive him back to school. I know it did me. Yesterday, he called all excited. All year he has been applying for job after job after job. He worked as a busboy at a Country Club for a while after he got fed up with the inner politics at Office Depot. He just started working at Radio Shack a few weeks ago but it is only part time. Now, finally he has gotten a job with a security company and is going to be a security guard at the local Courthouse. It is full-time. It pays more than he has ever made before not much on a standards of living chart but still for him it's a good job. I loved hearing the enthusiasm and excitement in his voice.

Of all my boys, he is the one I have always worried most about. He is extremely intelligent but must do things in his way and in his time. He wants to discover things on his own. He doesn't want to just take someone else's word for it. He is one of those that would have been questioning those who claimed the world was flat. He would have taken flack from everyone and in the end he would have been right. He stands by his guns. I'm proud of him. It's not easy to trudge your own path through life. He's not going to stand in line and follow the masses. He will take the hardest route and probably be more satisfied in the end.

I am just as proud of him as I am of the other two. Daredevil chose the Military Path, Chowhound will probably take the College path, and Improviser elected to join the University of Hard Knocks. I figure as long as they show responsibility and determination then they will be alright. All three boys have an abundance of both.

They all just amaze me.

I got a letter

Finally, my own personal letter from Daredevil. He is frustrated. They moved him to a different platoon. He says,

"most of the kids, yes I said kids, don't have even a hint of discipline at all. They can't stand still, they don't listen, and they don't stop talking. And the worst part about is that the DI's basically stopped training us....They won't teach us drill. And now the Senior DI says it not our fault. It's society and the Officers of Parris Island's fault because they aren't 'allowed' to touch us. And what's worse is that my old platoon is the best platoon in the entire company and they moved me to the worst Platoon in the company. This stupid Platoon is almost driving me to tell the SDI that I want to go home cuz I'm not learning shit. I still have my visa check card. I could go buy a bus ticket home if i wanted to. But, I won't do it cuz I'm not a quitter. I've never given up on anything I've done. Wonder if I can be pushed back one week and graduate with (cousin) like I was supposed to and may I'll get a platoon that actually cares. Everyone here says they want to be here but it doesn't show."

I guess being a band geek is finally paying off. He had discipline drilled in him from his Band Director for six years. Not to mention from me too. But, I think a large part of it came from being part of an organization where they all had to pull together. It is ingrained in his character. I hope the "kids" in his platoon grow up fast.

Life Resumes

Chowhound is home safe and sound. Well, actually, I should say he is back. He came home and immediately stole my car and went to his girlfriend's house for homemade ice cream. I swear, I am so mistreated as a mother. I get no appreciation from these teenagers of mine.

Teal Sound brought home the bronze (3rd Place) in DCI Division II Grand Finals. Congratulations to all! Chowhound came off the plane wearing his Teal Sound jacket and his medal. Someone in the airport came up to him and congratulated him. The Blue Devils are this years Division I Champs. The Boston Crusaders, who Chowhound auditioned for and didn't make, didn't even score as high as Teal did in the finals. Their loss.

If you have never seen a DCI group perform, you are missing a treat. The time and energy these kids put into the show is phenomenal. You can go to You Tube and watch one but it doesn't do it justice. You have to see it live. Chowhound was just glowing about it. He said it was awesome. They held this years Division I finals in the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, California.

I think about all that Chowhound has done in his life so far. Far more than I had done by age 17. This is the second year he has done drum corps. He has been in or traveled through almost all of the states east of the Mississippi River. This year they added the southwest states. Arizona was not one of his favorite. "The scenery was great but it was hot".

What a great nation we live in. That we are able to give our children opportunities such as these. I let my 17 year old son travel with more or less strangers all over the United States. He was gone for two months. I had no worries about his safety. Other, than flying home. He said it was a piece of cake. We can do theses things and sleep at night because of our armed forces. And now, one of my own will be defending these shores shortly. I am proud to be an American Mom.

Kidless no more

My childlessness is coming to an end. Yeah! Chowhound will be home this evening. He is at the LA Airport right now waiting on his flight. I wish I had a picture of that airport right now. I'm sure it looks an evacuation shelter. The DCI finals in Pasadena, California concluded last night. There are 70 corps groups with a minimum of 135 participants plus staff in each. The vast majority of these are flying out of LAX. Chowhound has been at the airport since 2am. He said everyone is blowing up their air mattress and sleeping anywhere they can. They been sleeping on gym floors all over the country for the last two months so why not the airport. There kids range in age from 14 to 19. What a site to behold!

I am very nervous about him flying home. He has to change planes in Houston. There is only one person he knows on his flight. He has never flown by himself before. The only other times he has flown was with me going to the Bahamas, twice. I'm sure he'll do fine. But, I'm anxious about it.

Well, time to get back to pacing.

I'm the Mom

I'm supposed to get the first letter. It's not fair. Daredevil's girlfriend got a letter. That didn't really bother me. I expected that. But, his Dad got a letter before I did. It's not right. I'm the mom. But, at least I have heard how he is doing. He says it's not as hard as he imagined. He's only in the first week. That will change. He loves the martial arts. His letter was upbeat and encouraging to me. No mention of homesick.

I'm going to start stalking my mailman. I want a letter of my own.

No news is good news

At least that is what everyone is telling me. Other than two address, I haven't heard from Daredevil. His girlfriend hasn't even gotten a letter. Of course, I know how much he hates to write so that may be part of it.

My nephew is now at Parris Island too.

Jake's Life has some touching photos he took recently. A Marine, a gun, and beanie babies. You must see. He is currently in Iraq and tells about some of the things he has seen.

Forgotten Meme

Once upon a time someone tagged me with a meme. CRS crept in and it slipped my mind. Then, life took over as it has a way of doing. I am supposed to list eight things about myself.

1. I procrastinate and suffer from CRS (can't remember sh*t). This is a deadly combination.

2. This is accompanied by periods of I can tackle the world. No, I'm not manic-depressive just human.

3. Although, I did self-diagnose myself as manic-depressive when I was 11. I was relived when I found out there was something that described how I felt. It was easier to deal with than the fact that I was being molested by my step-father.

4. I'm still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. So far I've come to the opinion that a grown up isn't one of the things I want to be. But, dammit it happened any how.

5. We had all kinds of unusual pets when I was a child. We had a skunk named Sam. We had two "flying squirrel" or actually sugar gliders. One was named Mitzy and would sit on my mom's head when she read. We also had rabbits, snakes, a white deer, possums, and lots of dogs, cats.

6. I had my picture in the paper for the bicentennial when I was in middle school. We had a dress up day for the occasion and my mom had made me an old fashioned style dress and bonnet. The newspaper reported picked me and a boy to pose in front of a buggy that was at our school. I hated that boy. I was appalled to be in a picture with him. I never saw the picture as we didn't get the afternoon addition of the News Journal. But, other people told me it was in there.

7. I really need to work on my self-confidence. People make me nervous and I have a difficult time thinking when other people are around. I'm best with one-on-one or big groups where I can float around from person to person thereby controlling my comfort level.

8. I've been in a long-distance relationship for three years. It's the best relationship I've ever had. We met through E-Harmony and I could write one of those sappy commercials everyone is always complaining about.

Okay. I did it. I'm through.

Daredevil's moved

I rushed to the mailbox and my heart skipped a beat. There were two letters from my recruit. The joy and anticipation was quickly replaced by confusion. I have two form letters postmarked the same day that give me conflicting Platoon numbers. I think they have moved him. From what I can figure out. It sounds like they had too many people in the original Platoon. So, for you folks I sent an address to, I'll be sending you a different one. If you already mailed a letter, which I have, they have assured me it will find him...eventually.

Carnival of Recipes is UP

"We've all had times in our life when we've decided to Just Say No to certain types of foods. (Some of us are much better at than others. This is not my strong suit.) This week, cehweidel has made it much easier to Just Say No when we need to by just saying yes to collecting great recipes for restricted diets, and the Carnival of the Recipes: Just-Say-No Edition is ready for your perusal at http://www.cehwiedel.com/blogs/kneadlework/?p=194. "

Quote directly stolen and plagiarized from Carnival of Recipes e-mail.

Next week is Crock Pots and I know someone who has an excellent Crock Pot recipe. (Hint, hint, blog momma. If you don't send it in I will).

It figures

I have two more weeks to get stuff done around here before Chowhound gets home and now I get a freaking cold.

Silence is a Strange noise

Quiet. The house is quiet of kid sounds. It still has house sounds and dog sounds. And if the dog doesn't get quiet I may have to do something about that. But, the house is absent of kids.

It's a strange sound. I can hear the hum of the air conditioner. The rattle of the vents. The compressor on the refrigerator. I hear the laughter of my boys but it's in my head and my heart.

I've spent the last twenty-one years surrounded by sounds. Babies crying. Toddlers laughing. Brother's arguing, teasing and fighting all in a pretense that they don't love each other. There have been the sounds of broken hearts and suppressed tears. Joys and screams of accomplishment. Musical instruments banging, clanging and blowing. Bedroom doors slamming. Car doors slamming. Basketballs dribbling. Dishes banging in the sink. The TV blaring.

Now I can hear myself think. And I think I miss it.

Scuba Sexy

Erotic wear for scuba divers?

Bootcamp past and present

Bootcamp Present

I was talking with my sister earlier this evening when all of a sudden she exclaims, "(Recruit) is home". What? No. Her son is supposed to be in Parris Island with my son. Nope. Not gonna happen. Yet. It seems they messed up his paper work. His report date and social security number were wrong. He spent two days at the processing center in Montgomery, AL, just to get on a bus and head back home to Florida for another week. By the time they corrected all the paperwork Parris Island was full. He will report next Monday. Recruit Daredevil is going to be looking for him. I hope this doesn't mentally make things harder on him since he was expecting his cousin to be there enduring this with him. Now, we will have to make two trips to Parris Island for graduation if all goes according to schedule and there are no other delays.

Bootcamp Past

When my boys were younger they were involved in the Sea Cadet Program at the Naval Air Station here in Jacksonville. The Program consists of two parts, The Navy League, which is for 11 -14 year olds and the Sea Cadets which is 13 - 17. These program are essentially Navy Reserve for kids. They meet once a month, learn to march, wear the same uniforms, and perform the same PT as the Navy Enlisted Personnel. They learn from the same books. Take the same test. Do the same drills. They get yelled at. They also go to Bootcamp.

All three boys went to MacDill Air Force Base in Tampa, Florida, for bootcamp. Improviser was so little that they duct-taped his canteen belt on him because it kept falling off. Their uniforms were all the smallest female uniforms I could find. I would cut about a foot and a half off of the leg length and hem them.

Let me tell you. It is hard to drive three hours from home and drop your 11 year old off for bootcamp. It didn't matter that it was only for a week. I was a wreck. Of course, I'm probably doing better now because of it. I know that my son has been prepared because of that and marching band. He knows how to sweat. He knows what it feels like to be yelled at. Yeah, I know Parris Island is on a much, much higher scale but he has had a taste.

Anyhow, the point of this post is that I found the letter that Daredevil wrote me from bootcamp when he was 11. I'm going to send it to him. He will get a kick out of it. It says,

Dear family,

Hi Mom, Dad and the rest of the family. Here in bootcamp thing aren't going as I planned that means it's going very well. The reason I say that is because on the first day I missed dinner and I missed to get me a canteen and a canteen belt, but the good thing are instead of the dry steaks I got TV dinners. I sorry my letter is so short but I have to take a shower.

Your son
(Daredevil)

P.S. I haven't got yelled at yet.

The envelope is post-marked June 30, 1999.

I wonder how that will compare to his first letter from this bootcamp. I'll keep you posted.

Support a Recruit

Recruit Daredevil is officially at Parris Island. He called his Dad last night with his scripted telephone call. Apparently, they have a card next to the telephone and they are only allowed to say what is on the card. I'm glad he saved that call for his father. It would have broke my heart. He called me from his cell phone a couple of hours earlier to tell me goodbye again and that he would see me in 13 weeks. He was almost to Parris Island. He sounded better than he had the previous couple of days.

My nephew had a few glitches in his paperwork so he was delayed a day. He should get to Parris Island sometime early this morning or today.

It's nice not having to go through this alone. My sister and I went through our pregnancies together (not these two particular kids) and now we go through the trials of Marine making. Of course, she has already given birth to one Marine last year. Now, come October 19, barring any setbacks, we will have three Marines in the family.

So, this officially makes me a Recruit Mom and Aunt. I've been doing a little research on the Marines to familiarize myself with the particulars of their branch. I have been "Navy" all of my life. I was a Navy brat and then a Navy wife.

There is a wealth of information and support at MarineParents.com. While browsing graduation information I found the Marine Graduation Foundation. Their mission is to help the families that can't afford to come to graduation. No Marine should have to begin their journey alone. I think it is a wonderful cause. At first, I was shocked that everyone would not flock to this grand occasion. Then, it hit me that when Daredevil's Dad graduated from Navy bootcamp there was no one there for him. Daredevil is fortunate. There will be a slew of people there for him and his cousin. But, others are not so lucky. Right now they need $925 to help two families attend the August 3 graduation. Spread the word through this wonderful blog community. I know we can help. These boys will have been through 13 weeks of hell and it would be a shame if they didn't have someone to celebrate their accomplishments with.




UPDATE: A total of $210 has been donated today and has been marked off the needed amount for the August 3 Marine Graduation Fund. Thank you to any of my readers that may have contributed today. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You are all awesome.

Quarters

Sign that your children are being coming adults.

When they see a bag full of quarters and yell "Laundry money!!".

Last night...

... was reunion and goodbye.

Chowhound is in town for a performance. Six weeks ago he left to tour the country with a DCI group. This was Chowhound's last chance to see Daredevil before he leaves for bootcamp tonight and Chowhound won't be back again until August 12.

After the performance we went to a local sports bar. Chowhound's girlfriend and her family joined us as well as Daredevil's girlfriend and a couple of their other good friends.

It was tough watching my boys with their girlfriends knowing that goodbye was inevitable. Chowhound not so much as they just officially started dating the day before he left for tour. But, still she was there pouting that she only had three hours with "Cinderella". Chowhound had to be back with his group by midnight.

It broke my heart watching "Nana", Daredevil's girlfriend. She was quiet and sad. Deployment sad. At different times, Daredevil would brush her hair from her face, kiss her head and then whisper in her ear. Young love. It's not hardened by heartbreak and life yet. It's fresh, it's real, and it's raw.

The toughest part won't be anything that the DI will do to my son. It will be what this separation will do to the relationship between Nana and Daredevil. They are facing lifetime changes. Do they have what it takes to endure military life? The separations, the waiting, the reunions just followed by another goodbye. They have hung onto this relationship for almost two years. They have faced obstacles and walls. The odds are against them. The facts and figures show that more than likely they won't make it. I want them to defeat the odds.

Goodbyes Part II

I had to stop the post above mid thought. It was probably a good thing as I was getting teary eyed.

All final goodbyes have finally been said and everyone is gone. It's just me and the dog for the next three weeks. I wonder who will crack first. The dog has a head start. He's neurotic in the first place and his hair has been falling out since Chowhound left six weeks ago. He used to break out in hives now he just loses his hair. He needs doggie prozac or something. Of course, I started loses my mind the moment I gave birth to the first child so technically I have a 21 year head start.

Daredevil is gone and headed to Parris Island tomorrow. Chowhound is gone and ultimately headed for California. Improviser is still in town and took possession of Daredevil's car until his is repaired. I was proud of Daredevil for volunteering to let him use it. It is his car. He saved up his money and paid for it. He did lecture Improviser and give him the what for's and what not to do as far as his car is concerned.

I'll probably be catching up on my blog now that my time is my own. So be prepared for lots of whining and crying that my babies are growing up.